04 October 2015

Christ Almighty!—the week of 27 September.

I kid you not: I got the comment, “Your Christ Almighty! posts come about a week late.” How’d he figure? “They have last week’s date on them.” Of course they do. They’re not this week’s articles: They aren’t live yet.

Throwing up their links will just frustrate people, and they’re frustrated enough by having to visit a whole other website. I think it’s easier to just go there first. But that’s me.

So, last week I went through There’s a New World Coming, the comic-book version, and wrote five posts on it. Here’s part 1 on Monday, part 2 on Tuesday, part 3 on Wednesday, part 4 on Thursday, and part 5 on Friday. Now you can read ’em all at once.

And Saturday, I posted something on the spiritual gifts test—like how it doesn’t actually measure spiritual gifts. Not that this’ll stop your church from testing people with it.

That’s it. Hey, if you wanna read these posts the day they’re up, come visit the site.

27 September 2015

Christ Almighty!—the week of 20 September.

If you’re not reading Christ Almighty! by now, I guess I’ve lost you. Or you’ve been busy. Yeah, let’s go with that.

Here’s what’s new on that site as of last week.

Come give the site a visit. Especially if you like the color yellow.

20 September 2015

Christ Almighty!—the week of 13 September.

Yep, stuff is still going on at Christ Almighty! So let’s get you up to speed.

Grace. (It really is amazing.)

Monday, 14 September

Most Christians define grace as “God’s unmerited favor.” Even so, we still talk about it as if it’s a substance. ’Cause God “pours it out” on us, or “gives” or “extends” it, or “covers us” with it. It’s a liquid, a blanket, a trinket—an object, not an attitude.

But that’s what grace is: God’s attitude. He loves us, despite our bad behavior, despite our rebelliousness, despite our apathy, despite our outright hostility towards him sometimes. Grace is the way God thinks of us, which overwhelms and overcomes everything we totally deserve. He ought to give up on us and sweep us away. But he forgives all, loves us regardless, and makes us his kids anyway.

It’s why we call it amazing.

And so on.

Must we read the bible every day?

Tuesday, 14 September

Just about every Christian teacher—myself included—tell Christians they gotta read the bible. ’Cause they gotta. We all do.

We live in a biblically-illiterate culture, folks. Bible references are like that old children’s game of “telephone”: One kid whispers a message to another kid, who whispers it to a second, who whispers it to a third, and so on round the room… till it gets back to the first kid, who discovers the message changed an awful lot in transmission. Our culture has done the very same thing with bible quotes.

I give examples.


Wednesday, 16 September

Mention meditation to the average person, and images immediately come to mind of sitting cross-legged on the floor, hands out, eyes closed, humming “Om” or something mindless—’cause you’re trying to blank your mind.

That’s eastern meditation. It’s the sort we find among Hindus, Buddhists, and Californians. It’s not the sort we find among Christians. Partly ’cause many of us Christians don't meditate, for fear of stumbling into the eastern variety. Some of us claim if you do practice the eastern sort—even accidentally!—you’ll open yourself up to demons, and they’ll flood into you like looters during a riot.

Okay. First of all, if you have the Holy Spirit in you, he’s gonna keep demons out. They’ll tempt, but they’ll never possess. (They can’t. He already took possession.) So don’t worry about that. Anyone who claims Christians can accidentally get demonized, obviously doesn’t know squat about God’s power and grace. Their fear makes that obvious. Ignore them.

More on meditation thisaway.

Jesus prefers his Christians fruity.

Thursday, 17 September

Yes, I know what “fruity” tends to mean in our culture. No, I don’t care. I’m taking the word back. Fruity fruity fruity.

Fruit is a metaphor we see all over the New Testament for behavior. The way Jesus described it, if you’re a “good tree,” you produce “good fruit,” and a “rotten tree” produces “bad fruit.” Mt 7.17 Paul didn’t care to even call bad behavior “fruit,” preferring “works of the flesh.” Ga 5.19 But the scriptures’ general idea is there’s good fruit and bad. Either we’re fruity in one way or the other.

More of the same.

Historical Jesus. (Who ain’t all that historical.)

Friday, 18 September

“The gospels aren’t historical, and the Jesus we Christians believe in is just ancient Christian fanfiction.” This, true believers, is the Historical Jesus hypothesis.

It’s hardly a recent theory. It predates Thomas Jefferson, who used scissors and paste to splice together a version of the gospels we nowadays call “the Jefferson Bible.” But in Jefferson’s gospel, Jesus does no miracles. (Well, one or two. Jefferson left ’em in because he liked the lessons in those particular stories.) Jefferson believed neither God, nor real-life Jesus, did miracles: Jesus was only a teacher of morals, and miracles were added by the church. So Jefferson only kept the lessons. (Well, most of them. He dropped the hard-to-fathom, hard-to-believe statements Jesus made in John.)


How I got mixed up with the Assemblies of God.

Saturday, 19 September

The quick ’n dirty way to size up a Christian is to ask them their church. “What church do you go to?” Then you compare them with all the nutjobs in their church. Never the sane people who go to their church; never the sober-minded, thoughtful, kind, friendly types. (Assuming you know of any.) Just the crazies.

So when people ask my church, I know that’s what they’re up to.

Rant continued.

13 September 2015

Christ Almighty!—the week of 6 September.

If you’re still visiting More Christ, relax; I’m not gonna leave you hanging. Here’s what’s going on at the new blog, Christ Almighty!

Wait, a new blog? What’s it all about?

Sunday, 6 September

Yep, it’s a new blog. In full, it’s called The Christ Almighty Blog. In short, Christ Almighty! In even shorter, TCAB, or “T-Cab,” as the kids might call it, if kids ever got around to reading it, and of course we all know kids don’t read. Really, neither do adults. Not even sure what you’re doing here. Oh right; curiosity.

The purpose of Christ Almighty! is to talk about Christ Jesus. Or as Americans call him, Jesus Christ.

But wait; there’s more!


Monday, 7 September

In Stephen Colbert’s first episode of his old show The Colbert Report (no, you don’t need to have watched it; no, if you wanna start, you’re too late), he defined “truthiness.” It’s a concept he expected to emphasize a lot on that particular show. Doesn’t matter what it means. ’Cause I wanna introduce you to this word, Christianism, a word I’m gonna use an awful lot on Christ Almighty!

There are Christians, who try to follow Christ Jesus. Don’t always succeed, but we try, which is the important thing. Then there are people who simply slap a Christian label on whatever it is they’re currently doing. Might think it’s legitimately Christian. More likely, never thought about it at all. Every other Christian they know does it. And if everybody’s doing it, must be Christian.

You see where I’m going with this?

So… do you know Jesus?

Tuesday, 8 September

I know better than to assume everyone who browses Christ Almighty! is a Christian.

I learned better on other blogs I’ve done. ’Cause some of the non-Christians piped up. There’s a certain personality type—the class clown, the noisy guy in the theater, the guy in the nightclub who wears way too much musk, the Facebook friend who over-comments on everything (which, I gotta admit, is sometimes me) —who can’t go anywhere without making their presence known. If you prefer to go unnoticed, these are the people you never wanna befriend; they’ll always embarrass you. And on blogs, they’re the sort who wanna make sure the blogger (i.e. me) knew they visited. Sometimes with a polite note, and sometimes by flinging poo like a chimpanzee.

Eventually I get to the point.


Wednesday, 9 September

Prayer is talking with God. No more; no less; that’s all.

Yeah, you’d be surprised how many people, including us Christians, think I’m oversimplifying and it’s way more complicated than that. Prayer, they claim, is a profound mystical and spiritual undertaking which must only be done thoughtfully, seriously, soberly, and ritually. Only then will it work.

It’s all crap, but it’s awfully popular crap.

More on prayer thisaway.

We’re wrong about God, y’know.

Thursday, 10 September

Theology is the study of God. ’Cause if we’re gonna follow God we gotta study him. Gotta find out what he wants, what he expects of us—heck, if he’s even a “he,” and we’re not using the wrong pronoun. (Fastest way to yank the chain of certain Christians: Use a different one. But let up after you’ve freaked them out a few minutes. Be nice.)


So… what does Jesus really teach?

Friday, 11 September

Ask anybody what Christ Jesus did for a living, and nearly all of us will say, “He was a carpenter.”

Yeah, he did do that for a living. […] My point is construction was Jesus’s previous job. By the time we read of him in the gospels, he left that job and took up a new one: Jesus was a rabbi. A teacher. You already knew that—even those of you who thought, “He’s a carpenter.” So why is everyone’s first response, “Ooh! Ooh! Carpenter!”

And I answer that here.

Son of God and cheesy Jesus movies.

Saturday, 12 September

When Son of God hit the theaters February 2014, various people at my church were talking about it like it was the Second Coming of Christ. (In fact, I got in some minor trouble ’cause I joked about this when I was presenting our church’s weekly announcements. Humor-deprived Christians merit a whole other rant. But not today.)

Rant continues here.

04 September 2015


More Christ has been online nearly five years. And as that five-year mark approached, I’ve been thinking about how the blog’s been doing. What works, what doesn’t. That sort of thing. I concluded it’s time to shake things up. Myself included. New challenge!

So beginning Sunday, I’m blogging at Christ Almighty! (Exclamation point part of the title.) It’s a new site. Same writer: Me. And of course I’m bringing my worldview with me, and my emphasis on knowing and following Jesus. All you really have to do is point your browser to a different website.

Yep, More Christ is passing away. As will everything in this world.